I know too much. After reading about one survivor of the most horrid, most devastating abuse, I realized that my own long ago abuse at the hands of my parents is in fact, literally nothing compared to what is really going on in our world. My experience is that any person who tells of their abuse is usually not lying about it. We are all left to make our own conclusion when we come upon a survivor’s testimony.
This is my conclusion which you may not agree with. That’s ok because this is my blog where I vent my feelings. You don’t have to read it.
Metaphorically speaking, the abuse that I endured left me with a limp caused by a fairly hard kick to one of my legs. Comparatively, the systematic abuse and mind control perpetrated by a long list of notable and highly influential ‘people’ that live in and run our current world, left this survivor armless and legless. Her limbs were sawed off in tiny increments causing the worst ongoing pain I’ve ever even contemplated. Not to mention what they did to her mind, her soul, her ability to feel human.
I don’t even know how she is still alive. This group of pedophiles has turned sexual abuse into a way of life, fully supported and condoned.
But alive she is and she told. Her testimony is there for anyone who wants to know. Of course, her high level and socially prominent abusers are right there to say how crazy she is, what a fertile imagination she has…all the things deviates say to discredit the victim. This is not new. These denials make it easier for the average person to walk away and say, well I guess we’ll never really know the truth and then we can blindly go on with our lives.
I’m left with the knowledge that if she could survive what she was put through, surely I have nothing to complain about. I recognized some of my abuser’s tactics in this expose’ of unwavering violence and sadistic torture, and I now fully understand my place in this shadow world of degradation. I got away easy.
I get that survivors of sexual abuse deal with the aftermath in whatever way they can. Some never get past the violations and relive the trauma every single day of their lives. Once I read this victim’s statement I came to the conclusion that I was one of the lucky ones.
I walked away from my abusers and started a new life unchallenged. Once I left, the abuse stopped. Even though I felt like the hunted for many years, the reality is I wasn’t being hunted. This emotion was a by-product and it was only my perception, not my reality. Did it fuck with my life? Yes but with time and effort I have come to a realization that no-one does anything wrong given their own understanding of their world. This is a hard statement to hear for many abuse survivors, but it helped me to get out of victim mode.
After reading this woman’s story, I now must look with new eyes at what happened to me. The people who abused me were amateurs, giving out exactly what they themselves had endured. Hurt people, hurt people.
The ‘people’ who abused this woman and countless others are Professionals of the highest order. This very large group of monsters still exists, functions and thrives unchecked, continuing down their giddy path of unmentionable horror. New victims are born every single day, their future as a plaything for monsters guaranteed. Their survival as human beings not a factor.
I beg of you, watch out for the babies in your life. Be relentless in your vigilance where children are concerned. Be prepared for the amazing ability of abusers to hide their crimes and program their victims to protect their secrets. If you think something is wrong, you are probably right. Sexual predators will go to any lengths to protect the sadistic torture of the kids they abuse and never underestimate their ability to continue along even after being caught. It’s always the one’s you would never, ever suspect.
If you have the stomach, you may want to look at this story. Even if you think you can handle it, I can guarantee that you really can’t, the details, the players, the victim’s, so beyond our ability to comprehend this truth, that when you read it you may unwillingly divorce from reality and step into the world as it really is. You will perhaps finally understand the true meaning of the word “victim”. Then what?
You, like me, will know too much. Proceed with caution. Put the following sentence into google, if you dare.
P.S. This essay is my opinion based on my research. I really don’t care if you believe it or want to ‘help’ me by de-bunking this information. Whatever your opinion of this is, Please Do Not respond with pessimistic problem solving or concern for my state of mind bullshit. If what I’ve written doesn’t seem like truth to you, I say good day to you, please just move along, keeping your opinion firmly tucked in.